would love a critique if you have the time

[deplour]

Good day Mr. Purves,
I've been a fan of your work for sometime, and would love to maybe get some feedback from you on my first animation. I'm currently in my undergrad program in the States where I'm pursuing sculpture, however it has presented me with the opportunity to indulge in my love of stop motion. As this is my first attempt (other than simple tests) at film making, I'd love the opportunity to hear what you and your readers think. Thank you so much
https://vimeo.com/45202310

[Barry]

Hi Jen, and sorry to take a few days to get back to you but I have just caught up with the film. It is beautifully disturbing, and I love the colour palette, the lighting, and the bold use of the space with the opening and closing shots. Great sound effects as well. It looks as if you had problems peeling back the clay to reveal the head - there might have been ways to secure the model somehow so it didn't move around so much. For some of the objects, such as the hand, I would have like to have seen them for a few frames more, but this is a very startling film. Well done. what is happening to it now?
all the best
Barry

[deplour]

Thank you for taking the time to watch and respond Mr. Purves, it's very exciting to say the least. Yes, as you predicted, I did indeed have issues with the head. I shot on location in a friends business that has a medical room and didn't consider A. how I would secure the form to the exam table , and B. how dry the clay (WED Clay) would get. As I was by myself, shooting completely in camera, and on a limited time schedule (I only had one evening after business hours), I did what I could..HUGE learning experience (and I do wish it wasn't so shaky). I will take your advise with the timing into consideration for the future, and am glad to have the feedback. I was part of a group show in which I showed Amygdala in the way it was intended (within a sculptural component. http://figurefunnybusiness.blogspot.com ... -form.html), and my professors submitted it to an animation festival locally (Atlanta) where it was shown (sans sculptural component). At the urging of said professors, I'm now trying to navigate inclusion in additional festivals, and am currently trying to figure out how to do so.
Thank you again!